Never settle for less

What happens when you decide to give up on something you want, what happen when you settle down?

what happen if you settle for less?

       Lets start by saying that I am no spoil brat, and I dont plan on doing, things should be work for, work hard for the things you want because when you do the satisfaction is greater that what you imagine, like a bath after a day of work or cleaning. 

      One of the things I keep hearing from friends and people I have date is “You will never find love with such high expectations”, and to be honest I have come close to believe its true. I am not here to talk about true love or of relationships because of that I must say I have no experience, which some times I feel my time is up long ago (I guess Ill talk about that in another occasion).

     I think its a sickness which is spreading way to fast, comfort and I am not talking about its verb or the money confort zone, I am talking about being conform with what ever you can find. Around me people in weeks or few month of dating come to the realization that maybe they will not find anything better, and it may not be what they dream of when kids “but what the hell” and they commit, after years they notice the big mistake or they just keep thinking “what if…” or “well…” and stuff of the sort, they not necessarily need to be unhappy but its not what they used to dream about. People say “Honey stop looking, when the time is right the person will come to you, just be patient and wait” but how can I get an A on a test without studying? I mean you dont hear people saying “If it meant to be an A it will be if you study or not”… I say “Never give up, never stop searching” but the difference is searching and being desperate, because when you get to that point you get blind, and you just settle for less. I know I have great potential (conceited much? jejej) its like I tell my friends ” If I could find a friend like you, who is always there for me in my times of need, if I found a friend like you which I had high expectations of trust and commitment as a friend why cant I expect the same or more of someone who’s going to share my life? If I could find friends like you I can find someone worth my time” I believe the trick part is on never giving up, your eyes on the goal, and never giving in to that sickness of conformity.

      Happiness is on working hard, dreaming high and fighting for what you want. Either if it is money, work, love, friendship, one of them, all of them, just work hard, dont conform but ALWAYS be grateful for what you have, look around you got a lot even if you dont notice it. When you work for gold you get gold, you get what you work for. So if you want BIG work BIGGER and dont give up when the times seems hard, because when they do and you get trough them it means your BIG is around the corner… but never ever settle for less.

Am I a bad person?

What if you find your self thinking about that person, an old love, some one you gave up because it was in a relationship or it wasn’t the correct time. 

What if you find your self in front of some old love? What do you do, what do you think?

       It was long ago when I met this one… and I think its the reason I am doing blogging lol *roll eyes*. But it is one of those person you meet and you click… it is meant to be for the least a friendship. I am a person who believe in love and hopes to find it someday, but no one seems good enough for me. I have high standars, I am no God and I am sure not perfect, but I wont settle in for less (but about that later). Today it happened to me, after years, I met with that person face to face… what do you? I just hi, short hug “we should talk” and kept on walking, is one of those persons you keep the phone number and email address and wonder why, you never use them, but you cant seem to trow it away.

         But it struck me… I kept on thinking the few minutes I was there, face-to-face, and minutes after the realization that my only concern was not hows the person, how are things going, the family, friends, study nothing of the sort, my concern and only question in mind  was “I wonder if they broke up?” and I actually was hopping they did, not with bad intentions, I mean after my realization I felt horrible and I wished they would still be together (I actually did from the heart) and I felt inhuman, I wouldn’t like people wishing that on me, and I wish them all the good and luck, they seemed happy together one of those couples that seems like they will never break up, one of those relationships you see and you envy but not in a bad way, in the way that you think “I wish I had someone like that, I wish that when I meet someone I will feel the same”.

     But the same question aroused my mind, this time in wonder of curiosity, “did they break up?”… and I try to block the thought… I did not want to think that, why would they, they wouldnt, did they? and there was no way around the question, it always came back… no good way of thinking it without feeling horrible, an then it came to mind… am I bad person? am I that selfish, what if they did and the person knew this? what would come to mind?  do I deserve the person after this…

I guess we are only humans, but is this a reazon or is this just a form an excuse to ease my mind?

A restless mind.

     Well I was inspired in this indirectly by my mistress Ivy (Edit: Goddess Ivy I knew that) and her “chubby” as she call him (Edit: its “hubby), my best friend Carlos. This is my first blog ever and its kind of dedicated to them, my inspiration.

    I start with this calling it a restless mind, and even thou people might say “well of course the mind dont rest, I mean we do but it dont.” I go beyond this. I call it restless because I exceed things, I observe, I think and over think things, I am overly curious for things people may not take notice or dont give much thoughts of. Because of this I dont think of my self Superior or different, I feel normal, a normal teenager. But my eyes are thous of a kid, full of curiosity and excitement, where everything is bigger and wonderful. My mind is restless not for common thoughts or common agendas (it has of that too of course) but I challenge my brain, my though, my soul into something much more, onto things much bigger.